Tag Archives: Blue Like Jazz

Facts and Fiction: 10 “impressive” things (I may have done)

by monteregina FLICKR

Okay, when you become wildly famous, rumors circulate, and some of them must be dispelled. I wouldn’t know much about that.

Just have some fun with this:

1. I invented Pop Tarts

Fiction. But I do like them.

2. I am an illegal alien of African descent.

Fiction. I was born in Puerto Rico, but the island is an American Territory. African descent? My Nana was a bit mum and shifty-eyed on that.

3. I’ve been hit by a bus.

Fact. I’m writing about that right now. Your appetite is now whetted, yeah?

4. Author Donald Miller wrote me a personal note.

Fact. It involved something about Paraguay and paper, but I don’t want to embarrass him too much at the moment.

5. I wrote Hebrews.

Fiction. But, It’d be great to write a book about my husband who makes me coffee each morning, and it could be called, He-brews: All about Hymns and Hers. (Okay, that’s but a working title) Also, I wrote a mediation in the Holy Bible: Mosaic. But, that’s not really the same thing, is it?

6. I’ve been shot out of a canon.

Fiction. But, I’ve both shot a Canon (camera), and written about the (biblical) canon.

7. I’m allergic to bananas.

Faction… half-in-half. Unripe bananas make the roof of my mouth feel like it’s sort of dry, splitting open, and raw. Ripe bananas? No problem.

8. I’m bilingual.

Let’s not get carried away.

9. My son can count cards, like Rainman.

Fiction. Nathan has autism, but his cool savant-type of qualities are limited to paper 3D models and legos. (So far, not all that marketable.)

10. I’ve stayed in Prague.

Fact. And I like to call it Praha.

Now you try.

1. List 1 fiction and 1 fact, and we’ll make a guess.

2. Guess what the photo is.

“Stuff Christians Like” -Jon Acuff (Receives coveted Liger Endorsement)

I just love this book!

When best-selling Blue Like Jazz (by Donald Miller) came out, lots of Christians ooed and awed about how insightful, witty, and clever Don was. I liked the book, a lot actually. But still, I couldn’t help feeling like hmm, how did this happen? Don has a knack for writing a funny memoir–and lucky for him, it was slightly before he could be reprimanded for making it sound–basically–like a blog. That’s all well and good, but, is it the funny we all crave? Not exactly. Is he super funny? Will his wit make you pee your pants?

Well, I conducted test after test, on a full bladder, and found that, no, a hefty chortle was pretty much the maximum laugh for my buck (about $13.) Don’t get me wrong, I think Don’s great. He’s great in a lumpy, comfortable, wingman with baggage kind of way. That’s fine. We all need our projects. One of mine is pitying him, and I also like to see what he’s up to next, because it’s usually interesting. I just like the guy.

But then here comes Jon Acuff. He’s a whole different species. If you compare Robin Williams to former supreme court judge, Sandra Day O’Connor, you’ll start to get an idea of what I mean about just how incomparably fun, whacky, and talented Jon is. Sandra, you’re fine, but don’t try too hard, ok? Don, pace yourself, you’ll be just fine.

So, I pre-oreder Jon’s “Stuff Christians Like” book (for under 8$) assuming it couldn’t meet up with all the hype. But it TOTALLY did! I won’t go into the testing process with too much detail, but I’ll just say, sometimes I read it while using the bathroom. (It’s a two birds with one stone kind of thing.)

My mascot/partner and I have developed a new ratings system for all epically wonderful things, and Jon’s book (which includes his blog from whence it came) is now quality-tested, and officially approved.

Jon Acuff's "Stuff Christians Like" earns 95% + approval rating!

What could get 100% Liger Approval you might be thinking? I don’t mind the question, actually.

Maybe the Bible? Or the Book of Common Prayer? No, apparently they wouldn’t. I don’t exactly know what Liger’s like. They are strange creatures with hopes, dreams, and moods I have no way of understanding.

It’s a rather vague system. However I can tell you Blue Like Jazz got 88.4 %, so that should tell you something.

Hope you get to read Jon’s book soon. Tell us what you think. That will be what it’s truly like… when the doves cry.

(If you didn’t read the book, that last part won’t be hysterical, and you’re probably going to feel left out. I’m – Sorry. Though I care about how you feel, I don’t make the rules about how you may or may not react emotionally to this sort of thing. Don Miller used to say, “Buying something makes you feel new.” Yes, he may have meant “new” in a false sense. But you’ll never know until you buy Jon’s book, now will you?)

Cheers!

😉